Friday, December 15, 2006

Today's Top Story

Your syncopated correspondent has discovered that Sphinx Ink is actually a….pseudonym. Believe it or not, Sphinx Ink is not her real name. Although several eye witnesses to Sphinx’s actual identity have disappeared under mysterious circumstances, this reporter will continue to dig for information. Already we know there are lawyers involved, but as I've said before, somewhere, "I'll take a bullet for the truth. As long as it's a small bullet in some non-vital place." Stay glued to this blog and any day now I’ll reveal the secret. Yeah, any day now.

This Just In

Stewart Sternberg Caught in Flagrante Delicto with a Squid! Some witnesses say the squid was female. Others claim that it was, in fact, Cthulhu. Basil Ratbane, who took the photographs of the incident, is holding out for more money so at the present time you'll just have to take the word of your astounded correspondent as to the truth of this case. However, check out this picture of Stewart, to the right of the page, and decide for yourself whether he seems the type to sleep with a squid.


Basil Ratbane said...

Yes, it is all true. I vouch for it, and I am the world's best voucher.

Stewart Sternberg (half of L.P. Styles) said...

That was no squid, that was my mother. She hasn't been feeling well. And, petting her down there helps to calm her.

Sphinx Ink said...

Gramlich, be warned. I will flog you with my law license should you impinge upon my secret reputation! I categorically deny everything and anything that Gramlich says, has said, or will say about me, unless it is flattering and resounds to my credit. As to anything unflattering, not only do I deny it, but I'll also take the Fifth. Or a fifth, whichever comes first.

Charles Gramlich said...

Ah my Dear, Dear Sphinx. One cannot resist the juggernaut of truth with a mere pebble of pedantry.