Saturday, November 10, 2012

Graham Charleston Reporting


Dr. Charles Gramlich, professor of psychology at a prominent New Orleans University, has made the extraordinary claim that reading the three books of the Talera fantasy series, Swords of Talera, Wings Over Talera, and Witch of Talera, will actually help you lose weight and maintain a svelte figure.  Gramlich says that, “those who read the slender volumes of the Talera series, which are quick and exciting stories, develop a speedier metabolism, allowing them to burn calories more quickly. This effect lingers for weeks after the books are finished,” he adds, “and can easily be prolonged further by consuming another book by the same author.”  When asked whether that author, Charles ‘Allen’ Gramlich, was any relation, Dr. Gramlich abruptly yelled “Fire” and left the room.  Nevertheless, this intrepid reporter believes Dr. Gramlich’s statements regarding the weight loss effects of the Talera series. Surely such a handsome and kindly looking fellow would not lie – Graham Charleston reporting, on the beat for the Deerhaven Examiner.

 
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27 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

That was hilarious, Charles!

Cloudia said...

Seems Sound to me!




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Deka Black said...

XDDD al ll the wordsmith are handsome. If not, writing makes him that way! ;)

BernardL said...

Fantastic marketing tool! :)

nephite blood spartan heart said...

It's absolutely true, I weigh less now than I did when I started reading.

Snowbrush said...

Charles, you have succeeded sufficiently in the BS Factor (a blood antigen) that you are now qualified to run for president.

laughingwolf said...

i believe... hallelujah... i believe! ;)

Charles Gramlich said...

Alex, glad you enjoyed.

Cloudia, me too

Deka, I know it worked that way for me. :)

Bernard, I hope so!

David J., Yes, you are positively svelte!

Snowbrush, I don't know. There are some true pros in the world today.

Laughingwolf, more to come!

Adventuresfantastic said...

ROTFL

Lisa said...

Strange but true :)

Prashant C. Trikannad said...

Very imaginative, Charles, enjoyed it! I believe certain kinds of books, horror and dark fantasy for instance, can have an effect on the body's metabolism.

the walking man said...

I don't really need to lose much weight--anything psychoactive in the ingesting of the tales?

Charles Gramlich said...

Keith, glad you enjoyed.

Lisa, thanks for your testimonial. :)

Prashant, that could be true.

Mark, stay tuned for further reports from the intrepid Graham Charleston.

laughingwolf said...

methinks this should wake up a few of your almost-readers :D

SzélsőFa said...

bwah-hah-hah.
it was a fun read, but it did make me wonder.
i think when a reader is much into a particular book (and a particular style of living), it does have an effect on the reader's life.
if you read a book about someone who's a great dancer for example you may (or may not) catch yourself trying some of the movements.

EA said...

Very clever! How can anyone resist?

Travis Cody said...

Hehehehee.

Charles Gramlich said...

Laughingwolf, I hope it works!

Szelsofa, you're probably right on that. I do. Let's hope folks reading the Talera cycle don't try some of the stunts. :)

Elaine, I am almost sure they won't be able to.

Travis Cody, :0

Oscar Case said...

I'll have to read them, but I'm afraid to, I've already lost 30 pounds in anticipation.

Charles Gramlich said...

Oscar, another testimonial. Wow, I'm good. :)

jodi said...

Charles- you are incredibly silly...

Charles Gramlich said...

Jodi, so I'm incredible, you are saying. Yes indeed! I agree with that.

pattinase (abbott) said...

Not so far-fetched either.

Rick Robinson said...

I believe every word of it. Thanks for the enlightenment. I'm assuming that repeated readings multiply the effect. Or... are multiple purchases of the series required?

Charles Gramlich said...

Patti, not in the least! :)

Richard R., multiple personal purchases are unneccessary, as I understand it, but the effect is magnified if a set is purchases as a gift for someone else who wants to shed a few pounds.

sage said...

pretty funny. will you pay my tailor to take up my clothes?

Charles Gramlich said...

Sage. They will magically take themselves in if you read Killing trail by C. Gramlich. :)