I wrote the following poem a few weeks ago now, but lest anyone be concerned, it does not reflect my current feelings. It was me on my
commute harking back to a much earlier time in my life. I imagine most people
go through phases like this. They just don’t write about them.
THE EMPTY
I see a pinprick of sun,
red on clouds to the east.
All else is gray.
Sky.
Water.
Road.
My empty heart.
I am a wave passing through.
Leaving a moment’s ripple,
that soon dies away.
No trail behind me where I went.
No path ahead where I go.
The world is a hollow place
and I have left no mark.
----
Even when I’m feeling good I don’t tend to write upbeat
poetry. I guess I’m just a moody SOB. But in an effort to be more positive, I
have constructed the following ditty. I do hope you enjoy.
THE LITTLE BIRD
Saw a little bird hop hopping all around
Eating the seed I’d spread on the ground
He hopped to the left and hopped to the right
He hopped all day; it was quite a sight
You could see his hopping was all for fun
As he bopped around in the glorious sun
The day passed sweetly and evening fell
Then came cat, without his bell
20 comments:
you are a wonderful poet, I love both poems, like reading from two different people that was how good they were
Charles, I liked both your poems and though I don't usually enjoy poems that rhyme, I liked your second poem because of the visual aspect. If a little bird's around, a cat can't be far off.
I no very few poets that write upbeat poetry. How could you in the world we inhabit.
"KNOW"
Two distinct enjoyable styles.
Lisa, thankee. I was in very different moods in the writing of the two
Prashant, I almost never write rhyming poems but I think it works for those supposed to be humorous.
Patti, very true. very true.
Bernard, thankee, man
The 2nd one is pure Gramlich with the unseen for twist in the road. The first *shrug* what better fate than to leave no footprints or signs of having this way come while not having a clear path to the place before you. why leave a trail, others may follow.
I like the second with a touch of noir.
Mark, I hadn't really thought of it that way. You may well be correct.
Oscar, lol. Thanks.
You are entitled to introspection and ditties too! Enjoyed both, Charles
ALOHA from Honolulu
ComfortSpiral
=^..^= . <3 . >< } } (°>
Love them both, Charles!
I don't know why, but poetry always has a certain sadness even when it seems to be upbeat... :-)
Cloudia, thankee.
Vesper, I do believe you're right. like the evening Golden hour for me. Always beautiful but a little melancholy.
Excellent poems. The first one feels akin to Buddhism or . . . Razored Zen . . . the same logic applies to all of humanity, the Earth, the stars -- everything.
And as they say, early bird gets the cat . . .
Erik, nihilistic is the phrase I think of in relation to the first poem. The second one is just a goof of course, but fun.
Oh snap! On that last one. Very amusing, though.
Happy poets don't exist, methinks. Even the ones who wrote "funny" poems were rather cryptic. Take Ogden Nash.
Enjoyed "The Empty" especially the closing line. Sharp, Charles.
Riot kitty, poetry by its nature seems a melancholy practice.
David, thanks, man.
haha...good on the cat...smiles...slipping the bell...birdie better watch it...ha...
i tend to roll moody these days as well..
Brian, maybe it's the change of seasons doing it.
I grok. Plus, that second one is funny! I think you should put it to music and add a chorus.
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