Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Battle Song

I started fiddling with a post on battle songs but got off track with a poem that I thought I'd put up. The song that I think captures a sense of battle better than any ever written is "Deaf Forever" by Motorhead. Love it. I basically tried to write more stanzas for that song, and try to make them relevant in some twisted way to today. If you listen to the song then you'll hear the rhythm that this poem should be read in. If you don't want to go to that trouble, no problem. This isn't very good anyway, and I wouldn't ever submit it anywhere.

I'm going to try and post the video, but if I don't get that done, I think this is a link to the song on You Tube. Deaf Forever

Battle on!

Cold as Hell
Battle yell
Death awaits me on the devil’s leash

Sword on shield
No one will yield
Worm waiting for the murdered feast

Cut them down
Killing ground
Dream of evil with an angel’s face

Shade of ice
Lost your honor in a blind disgrace

Bone and blood
Crimson flood
Love returns as an emptied lust

Nothing left
No blade to heft
Can’t feed a child on war’s cold crust



laughingwolf said...

damn... they're both powerful!

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

Pretty cool, Charles. Billy Joel (of all people) wrote a song about Vietnam with a lyric I'll always remember: we rode in spastic, like newborn horses/we left in plastic, just nameless corpses.

SQT said...

Wow. That is so good. I can't believe how effective it is in its brevity. I am impressed.

Anndi said...

Well rock on!

Well done Charles.

Randy Johnson said...

Good Deal. I got the rhythm right and actually heard Lemmy(always dug that gravelly voice) singing the words in my mind as I read. Love that band.
The Ace of Spades was the first album of theirs I ever bought. And I do mean album, a nice big vinyl record. Still my favorite by them.

the walking man said...

I didn't go to the link to get the beat and personally I am glad I didn't. This three line verse, six stanza piece has it's own beat and tempo right from the outset.

I'll also be honest in that I haven't read your books Charles but if you won't send this out to your various publishers, you should incorporate it "a la Tolkien" into a manuscript. It is very evocative of wars necessary cruelness.

Greg said...

nice! those are some good verses to get you pumped up.

Virginia Lady said...

I like it. It's stark and thought provoking at the same time.

BernardL said...

Good edition if lyrics, and they would fit.

Bernita said...

"It isn't very good anyway"
It's very good.

Bernita said...

Oh, and of course, I was thinking about poetry today...

L.A. Mitchell said...

Lemme would be proud :)
Potent images.

Heff said...

Motorhead. Gotta love the classics.

Cheri said...

Send me your email address so I can add you to my blog reader list.


Charles Gramlich said...

Laughingwolf, thankee.

Wayne, I don't know if I've heard that song. I probably did but didn't recognize the lyrics.

SQT, thanks. You're way too kind.

Anndi, gives her the Ronnie James Dio Heavy metal salute.

Randy Johnson, that's the first album I got by them too. I played Ace of Space itself over and over and...well you get the idea.

Mark, you're one of only 5.999999 billion who have not read my books. This is pretty much deliberate pastiche, though. Just from hearing the song in my head.

Greg, definitely gets my blood flowing.

Virginia lady, I have to take Metal music over rap, but there are a couple of songs I like from rap, songs my son got me into when he went through his rap stage. He's more into metal now.

Bernarld, I had to listen to the song a couple of times to get the pattern in my head first.

Bernita, sometimes it's just fun to play around. I was thinking about another kind of poetry post too, on the multiple layers of poetry. Not sure when I'll get it up.

L. A. Mitchell, Lemmy would either be proud or would eat me.

Heff, Orgasmatron is my favorite motorhead album.

Cheri, will do.

Tyhitia Green said...

I love it!! Especially that last line. :-)

AvDB said...

Now that was fun! Love Motorhead and your new "lyrics" are awesome. I'm giving you the forks right now.

Travis Erwin said...

I've always been partial to The Trooper by Iron Maiden.

Middle Ditch said...


Rock and Roll on Charles

Lana Gramlich said...

Blogger ate my comment. <:( I'd said something about how I enjoyed listening to you hash it out on the couch. Always love to hear you, though.

LoveRundle said...

Wow, I really like that. It's very inspirational, which I'm always looking for.

Steve Malley said...

I wave my lighter in your general direction!

Charles Gramlich said...

Demon hunter, thankee.

Avery, Rock on!

Travis Erwin, that's a good un too. I like the Motorhead one for it's ability to evoke a feeling of sword to sword combat. The "Trooper" is set later in time, but I do like it. Love the Eddie figure for it. Another fine one, about the loss of war, is Saxon's Broken Heroes.

Middle ditch, British bands know their warfare.

Lana, I enjoyed watching you while I was hashing it out.

Christina, I find it inspirational.

Steve Malley, headbangers r us.

Erik Donald France said...

Charles, Ooorah!

Thoroughly enjoyed it!

SzélsőFa said...

Some of my favourite bands are metal bands and you know that Charles.
'One' by Metallica would be my war song, but this poem is a really tough and spot-on one.
Such is war...

Charles Gramlich said...

Erik, glad you did.

Szelsofa, I like "One" a lot. I'd have to definitely consider it an 'anti'-war song, though.

Mary Witzl said...

I like the rhythm of this and a lot of the phrases, too. 'Worm waiting for the murdered feast' is great.

ZZZZZZZ said...

wow. Intriguing. I can't write songs if my life depended on it. haha

Charles Gramlich said...

Mary Witzl, I kind of liked that line myself.

Sheila, good to see you, and to hear you are doing well. I've not done much song writing, but a little bit.

Anonymous said...

It works for me. Your work is a worthy addition to the song.

Charles Gramlich said...

Jack, thankee.

Merisi said...

Master of the words,
this is very powerful stuff!
War is hell.

Sarah Hina said...

Fiery rhythm, Charles. And the words are fierce and chilling.