Wednesday, April 09, 2008

The Winnas!

*A Drumroll begins slowly and builds toward a crescendo. Charles, in a gold tuxedo complete with gloves, bow tie, top hat, and cane, strides onto the dawn stage. He lifts his hand for quiet and immediately the drum whispers to silence.*

“The Envelope Please,” Charles intones.

*The Lovely Lana, in a matching gold evening gown and delicate silk stockings, slinks onto the stage in six inch stiletto heels, holding a silver and copper tray upon which rests one snowy white envelope.*

*Pausing for a long moment to enjoy the view, Charles is reminded of the contest by a soft clearing of the Lovely Lana’s throat.*

“Oh, yes. The…uhm…contest,” he says.

*He takes the envelope, borrows one of Lana’s heels to slit the top, and then pours into his hand a micro-thin piece of ivory parchment. The drum roll resumes.*

“From a field of twenty-six nominees, the winners are. In the category of, ‘lucky enough to be drawn from a hat by Lana’s own hand.’ In no particular order. Bernita Harris and Shauna Roberts.

*The Drum Roll reaches its crescendo and falls silent while thunderous applause breaks from the packed house.*

“Congratulations to the winners,” Charles says when the wild applause has finally settled down. “Please, Bernita and Shauna, send me your choice of prizes and your address and I’ll get your book in the mail to you post haste. Contact me at: kainja@hotmail.com. If you need to refresh your memory of the possible prizes, the contest link is here.

*Charles watches Lana slink off the stage and follows post haste himself, twirling his bow tie while fire pots explode behind him and send glittering sparkles high into the air.*

*The rest is history.*

27 comments:

Farrah Rochon said...

Better than the Oscars. Congratulations, Bernita and Shauna!

Miladysa said...

Yay!

Congratulations to the winners :-D

Bernita said...

Awww.Thank you.
I have to say - I had today's post written and up before the draw!

Julie at Virtual Nexus said...

lol - very nice. Congrats to both - just called into Shauna's who's celebrating her first blog anniversary....

Shauna Roberts said...

Wow! I almost never win anything! And never anything with such a wonderful award ceremony, with the gold outfits and everything.

But I had already chosen what I wanted, just in case: an autographed copy of Cold in the Light. I'll send you my address.

Thank you, Charles and the Lovely Lana. I already posted this week's post, so I'll pass it forward next week.

ivan said...

Sure enjoyed your write-up of the ceremonies!

Heff said...

If my only option is winning a book as a prize, I might as well not enter the contests, lol.

Monique said...

Well done to Bernita and Shauna. I loved the stage and Lana in those high heels was hilarious.

Charles Gramlich said...

Farrah, I'm the John Stewart of blog award ceremonies

Miladysa, yes.

Bernita, congrats. And thanks for that dynamite review.

Julie, that first year goes fast here.

Shauna, congrats. I'll send that to you.

Ivan, like I told Farrah, I'm the John Stewart of online awards.

Charles Gramlich said...

Heff, Just think, if you don't like the book you could use the spine to play slide guitar.

Monique, Yeah, Lana gave me a certain look when she read this. I think she's afraid I'll try to get her to wear those heels in reality.

Travis Erwin said...

Sounds like you were a winner as well.

Lana Gramlich said...

Charles; You first (on the shoes.)

Steve Malley said...

Charles in a gold tuxedo...

That one's going to stick with me...

Travis said...

I have never seen contest winners announced better.

Bravo and brava to the gold-suited duo and congratulations to the contest winners.

**tosses confetti and flaming walnuts**

Sidney said...

I love awards shows!

Sphinx Ink said...

I heard the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences will be contacting you about planning the entertainment for next year's Oscar ceremony!

ChristineEldin said...

LOL!! Love the set up!!!

Congratulations to the winners!
:-)

Lisa said...

What pageantry! What lovely images will stay with me of you both :))

Merisi said...

"Six inch stiletto heels", oh boy, that's a tall number! I saw somewalk on four inch ones yesterday and was amazed that she could pull it off so well. Two more inches would leave me in the dust. ;-)

the walking man said...

I'm American...I want a re-count! Re-draw? LOL congratulations you guys. Choose wisely but Charles didn't tell you that from now 'til then you must wait for the mail in spike stiletto heels was one of the rules.

Peace

mark

Charles Gramlich said...

Travis Erwin, indeed I was, my friend.

Lana, no you. ;)

Steve Malley, let it go, my friend. Let it go. You shouldn't dwell on such horrible imagery for long.

Travis, thanks for the walnuts. They were quite tasty.

Sidney, I'm vying to take over from JOhn Stewart in the future.

Sphinx Ink, if they can meet my demands, we'll talk.

ChristineEldin, glad you enjoyed.

Lisa, hopefully the images won't become nightmarish.

Merisi, it's pretty much a joke between Lana and I. I think her feet are not much over six inches long so she'd be walking on tipitoes.

Mark, you're going to get me into trouble. Not that I've not been in trouble before and liked it.

Josephine Damian said...

Sounds like Charles was a winner as well!

*blushes*

Lana Gramlich said...

Charles; No, really...YOU. ;)

Anndi said...

Love the visual... all that gold. Thank goodness Lana didn't fall, but then, you would have caught her. ;)

Brava to the winners!

Jack said...

Congratulations to the winners and thanks for running such a great contest.

Michelle's Spell said...

Love Lana's outfit! I'll have to check out all the titles.

Shauna Roberts said...

Wearing a form-fitting long black velvet dress with a necklace of rubies and matching ruby chandelier earrings (so that I can be even sparklier than Charles in his gold suit), I accept my award and announce my own pay-it-forward contest at my blog: http://shaunaroberts.blogspot.com/2008/04/mitzvah-madness-pay-it-forward-contest.html (or just go to http://shaunaroberts.blogspot.com and look for the 15 April post).

Thanks again, Charles!